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As a small business owner do you care what people think of you? Do you not do things in your business because you worry about the opinions of others?

We increasingly live in a world where there are two ends of a scale in terms of people’s opinions. There’s one end where we’re encouraged to show up and be kind, compassionate and supportive, and of course, I wholeheartedly agree those are standards we can all learn to embrace.

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Then there’s the other end of a scale that we know well in the online space, that’s full of people bringing bad attitude, trolling and bitching, who perceive they have the right to have an opinion no matter who may get hurt in the process.

When you show up and start to build a business online, there will inevitably come a time where alongside the positive people who will support you, there will be others who will judge you negatively and they’ll feel at liberty to share negative opinions of you with you and with others..

I’m sure you’ll love the positive opinions. But how do you feel and deal with the negative opinions?

Do you also take on board the rude, abusive, bitchy opinions and let those impact you negatively, causing you to feel crappy, leave you wondering why you’re even bothering to build a business in the first place?

It’s important to be mindful that when we grow our businesses online, there isn’t this kind of perfect ideal, where all you’ll ever get are positive opinions. The dark stuff will come. And you have to have some sense of how you’re going to cope with the idiots that try to cast a cloud over your day(s).

I consider myself fortunate, because I’m older and wiser, and don’t give a rats ass about other people’s opinions of me and my biz. Of course I love the positive opinions and appreciate them, but when the nasty comments and jabs show up – they don’t go in. I see them for what they are – a reflection of some sad-ass person feeling the need to leave detritus like that in a poor attempt to feel better about themselves. 

My strategy with every single troll or bitchy comment, every bad jab, low opinion that someone chooses to offer to or about me, is to never engage, never give them air space, never let them have any two way communication with me.

I know there are lots of business owners in the online space who choose to engage and get into huge arguments with the negative people that show up. They feel that they have the right to have an opinion back, which is true.

But personally, I would rather focus my attention on the women that want to be around me in a positive way, and who get real value from me and the services/products I sell, than to spend any of my precious time engaging with monsters online.

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If ANYONE comes to my space with their bad vibe, being nasty to me, to my business, or more importantly to any one of the lovely ladies in my tribe, those people are blocked and removed from my business – right across my business, without notice.

Ladies who have joined my Inner Circle know this is how I operate. It means they show up knowing they’re coming to a safe space, and they show up knowing I have expectations that they will come to my community as a nice, decent bird.

On the flip side of the above, I also want you to be mindful that when you’re a nice person (which I’m sure you are), you can sometimes feel that you have to show up and be nice to people no matter what.

But you can’t. Not always.

Business is tough. And sometimes you’ll have to turn into a ‘not taking any of this shit’ business owner to deal with certain situations.

Let’s say you’re at a point in your business where need help because your business has grown and you’re becoming more successful. So you bring on board a VA, who on the face of it looks brilliant. They start work for you, and three months down the line you find out they’ve been persistently cheating you one way or another.

Suddenly you’re faced with a difficult task. You know they have to go, you know you have to deal with the cheating issue, you know they’re a single parent with two kids. The nice side of you feels guilty because you don’t want to impact that person’s life even though they’ve cheated you. But in reality, it comes down to you or them. And in that situation (and many others you’ll face in your business), you have to be strong enough to put your bad bitch armour on and deal with it.

Doing so will be the ONLY way you’ll survive in business when the bad people come your way.

That doesn’t mean you’re a nasty person, it doesn’t mean your nice character is in question, it does mean you’re showing up protecting you, your assets, your customers, your clients, your business. 

Understand you’re not joining the camp of trolls and bitches who show up and throw their shit at people just for the thrill it gives them, when you have to take strong/negative action in your business that is really positive action, to protect you and your business as you grow online.

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Blocking people
Firing people
Standing up to people who cheat you
Speaking out to competitors who trash you publicly
Dealing with people who outright copy you
Standing your ground when a collab goes wrong, a business partner cheats you, suppliers fail you miserably, people don’t keep their commitments to you etc..

All of these are situations where you have to shelve your nice character for a moment, and move a little over to the other side of the scale to become a female business owner who stands tall and deals with that crap.

Be nice to the people who deserve you. Be hard as nails with the people who don’t. Know you can keep your great character intact in both situations.

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